Puppy Love

2 min read

“We are getting a new puppy”, said my co-worker with a smile.  “Our kids loved the dog, and she should be delivered to our home in the next week.  I am excited because the kids are so happy and have promised to be involved in looking after her.   You have dogs, do you have any advice from me ?”

I responded socially as one does in these settings.  The answer isn’t just about information, it is equally about signaling your attitudes. 

“That’s wonderful.  You are going to be really happy with this decision.  Nothing like a pet dog to bring a family closer together and teach kids responsibility.“ 

Having established my credentials as a normal sociable animal lover, I then proceeded to establish the next set of credentials as a disciplined dog trainer. 

“But you must focus on training.  The puppy should be kept in its training cage so that it is secure and does not feel scared.  Also you must set a strong schedule so that it learns quickly to only poop and pee outside.  If there are accidents, you must not shout at the dog, but instead firmly indicate its mistake.  It loves to please, so it will soon learn what you don’t like and what you do like.  And be consistent, don’t have mixed messages from across the family.“ 

Over the next few months, I would receive updates from my colleague on how the new puppy was settling in.  I also saw Instagram pictures of a family quite taken up with it’s new member.  All clean, smiling.  It seemed like they had not only taken my advice, but that getting a routine had been easy.  And the kids were very involved.

I smiled at each update, and it took me back to the times we have brought a new puppy to the home.  A magical moment of  smallness, newness, cuddliness.  Kids wanting to pet the puppy, to caress it, to sleep with it.  Moments only interrupted by the occasional accident on a floor, and maybe a rug.  Sometimes the accident was followed by an amount of recrimination between family members of who was meant to have taken the dog out.   Nobody would shout or remonstrate with the dog, since by then people were shouting at each other.  My wife would be frustrated that all her good training was being mishandled by the kids, who would equally lay claim to any moment that the dog seemed to follow instructions while  declaim any moment of accidents.

I would tell my wife, “I know of no other family that has such problems, its only us !  Everyone says their puppies are housebroken by 3-5 months.   We have dogs that have mishaps years after!”   At moments of failure, the different attitudes to poop on the floor became apparent.  Kids were pretty ok to have the dog go on the floor and deal with the consequences; less trouble than actually walking the dog when required.

What is it about our family and our dogs that defy training ?  Too many people, too lax an attitude, too much feeding, can’t tell.  

A few weeks later, as I sat at work in the  midst of these uncharitable thoughts of envy, I hear my co-worker on the call speaking about some issue. “That’s ridiculous, he was meant to have been there to take her out, a dog is a responsibility, he has to balance.  Ok, ok I will head home”.   He gave me a sheepish look, “first time the dog has had an issue in some time, our rug cleaners will take care of it”. I smiled sweetly and full of compassionate schadenfreude.  “Yes, that does happen at times.  Need to make sure the dog stays trained, that’s what works for us”. 

Our dogs are very much part of our lives, we love them and keep them as family.  Unfortunately, like every part of our lives, the reality is much richer than we want our stories and pictures to admit.